I've learned that the more aware I am of my tone, my word choices, the ways that I ask for things or the ways that I communicate when I am cranky - the better I do at offering service from my heart, even the little things.
The other day, Syr asked me to do a minor errand while She worked on dinner.
It was something where I was fixated on doing some things in a particular order. I can be a bit type A in that way. I like to do things in what "feels" to me to be the most efficient manner possible, which isn't necessarily always what my Owner actually wants. But I do sometimes get stuck on that.
This was one of those moments. I kept "asking" for clarification because Her way just wasn't making sense to me. It got to the point where I spent so much time negotiating (read: arguing), that I actually used up more time doing that than I would have if I had just done as She'd asked in the order She'd asked. And I ended up pushing too hard and Syr suddenly and abruptly (and quite sternly) said "Come here. Now."
It was Her tone, and that part of me that knew I was being stubborn that woke me up. I set down what I was carrying and went into the kitchen - meek as a mouse and feeling pretty ashamed of myself.
The lecture that ensued was much deserved, as was Her frustration. It was a simple task.
But something about the way She'd handled it, was a much needed wake-up call. A little poke that my attitude needed readjusting. And so that's what I've done.
We have a lot of banter and play and a good dose of bratty push back in our dynamic, but it's important to me and to my Owner that the line is drawn when appropriate and that I will toe the line when needed. It's important for me to stay committed to that work. This was an opportunity for growth and awareness for me.
